I love one line Wednesday. It's fun to go through you WIP, or published manuscript and find those little nuggets that captures who or what your characters are. The theme this week was dialogue. Now it can be difficult to capture a fun line because without the other 'stuff' around that one line, things could be taken out of context.
However, my one line was pretty straight forward: "Noooo...so unfair. I don't have any hot neighbors, just acres and acres of corn fields.' (technically two lines, but who's counting?)
Here is the expanded version between Lindsay and her BFF, Tina, who is also married to Lindsay's brother, Nick.
The whine of a miter
saw became louder.
What was he doing now?
Lindsay minimized the
application on her computer and swiveled to look out the second storey window.
Her home office overlooked the new neighbor’s driveway. A neighbor who’d become
extremely distracting.
She couldn’t make out
his features, with a baseball cap covering his face from her elevated view, but
she sure could see his body. At that moment Tina’s ringtone sang out.
“What’s shakin’ bacon?
Still watching Hot Stuff next door?”
Lindsay dropped the
curtain as if burned.
“No.” She faced her
computer, which had gone into screen saver mode. “I’m at my computer.” She
jiggled her mouse and a CAD program popped up, displaying a current renovation.
“You are such a liar.
I’ll bet you haven’t touched your mouse until right now.”
Lindsay let go of the
mouse. How did Tina always know what she was doing? It was like she had a spy
camera in her office.
“I shouldn’t have told
you what he was doing.”
“Well, you did and now
I want to know more.”
“You’re a married
woman. You shouldn’t think this way.”
Tina laughed out loud.
“I may be married, but I’m not dead. Besides, I can look at the dessert tray as
long as I don’t place an order.” Lindsay imagined Tina’s eyebrows waggling
while she spoke. “Come on, woman. Feed my avarice.”
“I’m doing crosswords
at the doctor’s office while I wait for my appointment. Stop stalling. Give me
details. Have you figured out what he’s up to?”
Lindsay stood, and partially
concealed by her curtains she watched, as she had for most of the morning. What
she saw pushed her pulse into overdrive.
All sweaty in a pair
of low-rise Levi’s and scruffy work boots, Hot Stuff grabbed a water bottle and
sucked back huge gulps. As his thirst was quenched, her mouth became
paradoxically drier. His wide shoulders and hard chest looked as though they’d
been sculpted by Michelangelo himself. Twin ropes of muscles carved around six
pack abs and caused her heart to trip along a little faster.
“Well?” Tina whispered
into the phone.
“He’s finished
clearing the backyard.” Lindsay whispered back. “Now he’s cutting lumber, but
they’re too short for even a deck.”
“I don’t know if you’re
ready for this. He’s shirtless.”
“You’re killing me,”
Tina groaned. “Is he built?”
“Noooo…. So unfair. I
don’t have any hot neighbors, just acres and acres of corn fields.”
There you go. I hope you enjoyed.